[op-ed] Is the Canadian Government my Sugar Baby…
Alright — hear me out. I’m a little mad because, well, I checked my paystub. I looked at my Gross earning, smiled and gazed down towards my NET… fuck. Now I need to vent:
Imagine a relationship where you give endlessly — money, time, and energy — but receive very little in return. The other party promises love and care but rarely delivers anything tangible. If you squint, this dynamic starts to resemble Canada’s relationship with its taxpayers. Yes, dear Canadians, you might just be the sugar daddies (and mommies/people/livestock, W.E.) in this equation, while the Government of Canada finesses the role of a high-maintenance sugar baby.
While taxes are necessary for societal function, I am starting to get frustrated over the imbalance. You pay a hefty chunk of your income to fund services, yet the promised perks often feel like a mirage — always on the horizon but never fully realized. Let’s me explain:
What Makes Canada the Sugar Baby?
A sugar baby, by definition, expects financial support in exchange for companionship or benefits. In this analogy, the Government of Canada collects taxes — your financial support — with promises of social services like healthcare, infrastructure, and affordable housing. But let’s face it: the returns on your investment can feel lackluster.
Here are some hallmarks of a sugar baby dynamic and how Canada fits the bill:
- The Constant Ask for More
Sugar babies often hint (or outright ask) for gifts, vacations, or an upgraded lifestyle. Similarly, Canada’s tax system is one of the “most progressive” in the world, with high income tax rates, sales taxes, and additional levies at provincial and federal levels.
Yet, Canadians are often left wondering: where exactly is all this money going? In 2022, the combined federal and provincial income tax rate for top earners in Ontario reached 53.53% — over half of their income…
2. Promises of Benefits… That Often Disappoint
Sugar babies entice with the allure of companionship or a luxurious experience. Canada lures citizens with promises of universal healthcare, well-maintained infrastructure, and affordable living. But ask any Canadian waiting months for a specialist appointment, dodging potholes, or trying to buy a home in Vancouver or Toronto, and they’ll tell you it’s not quite as advertised….
3. Unclear Financial Accountability
Just like a sugar baby might not always explain where your money went, government spending can be frustratingly opaque. Federal budgets allocate billions for various initiatives, but audits often reveal inefficiencies, misuse of funds, or projects that fail to deliver value.
The Tax Breakdown: What You Pay vs. What You Get
Let’s get specific. Here are some major areas of Canadian taxation and how their promised returns stack up against reality:
1. Healthcare: The “Luxury Spa” That’s Always Overbooked
Healthcare is Canada’s “crown jewel” in social services, but it’s tarnished under closer inspection. Yes, it’s “free” at the point of use, but taxpayers foot the bill through high income taxes. In 2022, the average Canadian family paid $15,847 in taxes for public healthcare… Surprise, Surprise… It’s much, MUCH HIGHER NOW.
Yet, long wait times remain the norm. In some provinces, you’re waiting 25 weeks for non-urgent surgeries… That’s IF someone see’s you at all (if you can get in).
It’s like promising a luxury spa day but delivering a Groupon experience: too many people in line and not enough towels.
2. Housing: The Promised Penthouse That’s a Basement Suite
The federal government collects taxes to fund affordable housing programs, yet housing prices have skyrocketed. Between 2005 and 2022, the average home price rose by 318%. Programs like the First-Time Home Buyer Incentive have provided minimal relief to the average Canadian, especially in hot markets like Toronto or Vancouver.
Instead of the promised penthouse suite, you’re getting a dingy basement apartment with an air mattress (for 2K to 3K a month). Relax — It’s not New York.
3. Infrastructure: Pothole Paradise
Canadians pay significant fuel taxes, tolls, and additional levies to support infrastructure. But whether it’s potholes, outdated public transit, or delayed infrastructure projects, it’s clear that the investment isn’t always yielding top-notch results.
Driving in some parts of the country feels like navigating a Mario Kart track.
4. Social Programs: The “Designer” Handbag That’s a Knock-Off
Canada touts its array of social programs, from Employment Insurance (EI) to childcare initiatives. However, these programs often fall short when demand surges. For example:
- EI applicants during the pandemic faced delays and complications in receiving benefits. Or, they get cut-off outright without notice and left to fend from themselves.
- The childcare subsidy system is a patchwork.
Meanwhile, Where Does Your Money Go?
Canada’s federal budget dedicates billions to international aid, green initiatives, and other programs that, while important, often feel disconnected from the day-to-day struggles of taxpayers. In 2021, $6.3 billion was allocated to foreign aid. While global responsibility is admirable, it’s hard for citizens to feel generous when they’re struggling to access basic services.
What Would an Equal Relationship Look Like?
In a healthy relationship, both parties feel valued and supported. If Canada wants to balance this dynamic, here’s what (I think) needs to change:
- Transparency in Spending: Citizens deserve clear, accessible breakdowns of where their tax dollars are going. Budget accountability should be a priority.
- Improvements in Efficiency: Streamline bureaucratic processes to ensure programs deliver what they promise. Whether it’s healthcare wait times or infrastructure delays, the focus should be on outcomes, not optics.
- Taxpayer ROI: Introduce measurable benchmarks for taxpayer-funded programs. If a project or initiative underdelivers, reallocate those funds.
- Lowering the Tax Burden: While maintaining essential services, governments could work to reduce wasteful spending, allowing room for tax cuts.
Final Thoughts,
This was a speed-run, vent sess… Canada’s tax system feels one-sided. I have no faith in any elected politician in the country’s pipeline. Why are women still try to fight for the right to choose? it’s 2024 going on 1925?
Citizens pour money into the system with the expectation of receiving well-rounded, robust services. Instead, they’re often met with delays, inefficiencies, and unmet promises.
This isn’t to say Canada isn’t a great place to live ... But just as in any relationship, it’s important to address imbalances and work toward fairness. Until then, Canadians will keep playing their role, dutifully handing over their financial support, hoping for the day their sugar baby government delivers on its promises… Honestly, I think I’m ready to settle down with a real, caring, loving, thoughtful, NOT SUGAR BABY — Government of Canada.
